In particular, I’m speaking of fire and police departments across the country. These programs leech off us, allowing the government to steal money from our hard-earned paychecks for the sole purpose of saving homes, businesses, and people from the carelessness of liberals who want no accountability for their actions. Instead, they want the government to swoop down and intervene whenever a few flames engulf their property or lives. It’s a slippery slope toward ever-increasing government control and interference in our lives.

We shouldn’t have to pay to save them from their laziness. They should be responsible for their own actions and protection.  The free market should dictate who is saved, when they are saved, and attach a fair price. It worked wonders for ancient Rome’s Marcus Crassus, and it worked after the great London fire of 1666, when homes certified by fire insurance companies got plaques indicating that they should be saved first. Homes without insurance didn’t get plaques, and the private fire brigades viewed them as so much kindling.

Public funds are growing scarce. Who wants to save the neighbor’s house when he’s constantly having annoying parties with loud music and an overgrown lawn which resembles an automobile hospital triage?  Not anyone with any sense.

We must not let this Red fascination with “common good” invade “common sense.” We should allow those places who refuse to pay for protective services to get what they deserve. The owners of potentially burning properties need to take personal responsibility to keep fires at bay.

The bleeding heart crowd loves to sell out our country to a communist idealism that is present within modern-day fire brigades and police departments. These publicly funded bureaucracies are too inefficient to deal with today’s modern crime and fire. Privatization is the only way to go. Let the so-called victims of fire, theft, or other acts of man or nature pay a fee for services rendered before they happen. That’s the way business works in our capitalist democracy; you pay for services, and the more you pay, the better the service. If you can’t pay for the service, then you lose, or you give your property as collateral.

It’s a simple plan, and it will save us from the Godless Communism that threatens our sovereignty. The Founding Fathers would never have agreed to anything related to the Common Good, I’m absolutely certain of it, and since being certain without reason is good enough for our President, it’s good enough for me.

Links:

• http://www.chicagofirepatrol.com/Chicago_Fire_Insurance_Patr.html

• http://rawstory.com/news/2007/As_public_firefighting_decays_billion_dollar_1210.html

• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crassus

• http://www.reason.org/ps152.html

spread the panic!

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Tags: capitalism, fallacy of libertarianism, fire departments, history, police, satire, socialism

This entry was posted on Thursday, July 24th, 2008 at 9:14 am and is filed under Panic!. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.