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Waldorf’s Week-in-Review

November 30th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

Aren’t we all thankful there are no more political ads running on TV right now? I am. For the week of 11/23/08.

(- – - -) Who the hell thought up Waldorf Salad? Apples and Mayo in the same dish? If I want gross, inedible foods, I’ll stick to my family heritage, the foods of Germany and Ireland.

(+) An “interesting” video explaining NASA’s urine recycling system. I say interesting for the subject matter and not the hosts of the video. This is why we need actors. Another take at the end actually has the host saying the water has a bit of a “wang to it.”

(+) The above said urine-recycler apparently works after a quick fix. I wonder if they did a taste test to determine success/failure.

(- – - – -) To the mindless, intense, and deadly consumerism that runs rampant on Black Friday. Incredible. I shopped at 4 AM one year, and was so skeeved out by such intimate contact with strangers that I sat out the rest of the “shopping season” in a darkened closet clutching an aluminum baseball bat chanting “Santa Claus is Coming, and he’ll fix you. . . all of you.” I’m much better now – ignore the eye tick.

(- – - – -) To fucking dangerous idiots who perpetrate mindless killing in the name of anything. Normally I’d simply lambast those who do in in the name of a deity, but there are other, just as stupid excuses, for acting out such violence on others. I am no peacenik hippy (aversion to patchouli) but I surely do not condone such horrendous acts, whether by an individual, group, or government.

(-) So gas has been much lower, costs are coming down, but the price of a gallon of milk seems to be staying the same, even after markets claimed they needed to raise the price due to increased fuel costs. Bastards.

(WTF!?) ALLEGEDLY some police in Wisconsin made two Iraqi war vets lap up their own urine. I don’t know what to say to this. What a perfect recruiting tool for the soon-to-be-booming-again militia movement.

spread the panic!