Archive for December 19th, 2008


I’d Like to Ruin Television For You: The Death Knell of the Fall Schedule

December 19th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

The good news first:  Lost, Battlestar Galactica, and Burn Notice all return in January.

The bad news (and some good news) is that there are some heartbreaking losses in the war for television ratings.

ABC took the form of the classic Grim Reaper, complete with wicked scythe. A-reaping they did go on Wednesday evenings, cutting a wide swath through their midweek programming. They cut down Pushing Daisies and Dirty Sexy Money, leaving them like the chaff that they are.  While there is no official word on it at this time, the rumors spew all sorts of gems, and friends, I believe the rumors to be true. They have also clipped Eli Stone’s George Michael-induced fantasies, and will not be renewing the series for another year.

Honestly, while I thought Eli Stone had some charming bits and Dirty Sexy Money had Peter Krause, I’m not too terribly upset by this news.  The heartbreak, for me, my family, and our devoted TiVo is the loss of Pushing Daisies.

Pushing Daisies was, by far, one of the most interesting shows on television. From the gorgeously painted and stylistically created scenes, sets, and over-saturated colors to the droll, dry humor of the characters unknowingly repeating the dry, droll narrator (Jim Dale who narrated the Harry Potter audiobooks). The plot and stories are far-fetched, as is the premise, but it’s a fictional television show! It was a complete delight. However, I have not watched the last five episodes.  They await as recorded programs on the hardy TiVo.

The good news to come from this is the rumor that Bryan Fuller (he also created Dead Like Me, a fantastic treat on Showtime) will be returning to Heroes.  Good.  Heroes needs some sharpening.

ABC is bringing back Lost and Life on Mars for the “spring”, so there is at least some joy.  Sadly, though, they will also bring back The Bachelor. Oh well, I suppose that there needs to be something to offset the good.  It’s like getting a fantastic meal, but dessert turns out to be some whipped cream on a spoon.

NBC is likely canceling My Own Worst Enemy, Crusoe, and Lipstick Jungle. Knight Rider is in danger of being canceled, so it’s very likely it will get a shot of The Hoff. Can’t go wrong with a shot of Hoff. I hear he likes the cheeseburgers. 

Kath & Kim is a keeper on the peacock, and I have to tell you I am enjoying the show.  The uncomfortable humor and the cluelessness of its inhabitants are simply delightful. Thank you, Australia, for this piece of entertaining lint. Life seems to need a boost, too. I say either put the star in a band-of-brothers flashback or give it a shot of. . . you guessed it, the Hoff.

CBS is pretty content with the regular craptasm they call a programming schedule. There is ONE casualty, and that is the incredibly stupid and manipulative The Ex-List. They have yet to pick up the full season of Worst Week. I say do it. You’ve got nothing to lose at this point. It’s not a bad show either and sure beats prime time game shows. While the uncomfortable comedy of the first few episodes was painful, it has come into its own and become delightful in the discomfort. Not disturbing “Warren Ellis” types  of uncomfortable, but kind of like “Ricky Gervais” uncomfortable. (Can I stop writing the word “uncomfortable” now?)  CBS is also bringing back Flashpoint (not that I care) but not Jericho (the CW is).

FOX is satisfied with the cold turds they serve as an alternative to TV Dinner Salisbury Steak (with gravy!), except for Do Not Disturb. It had the (dis)honor of being the first show cancelled, with only two episodes aired. It may have beaten Down the Shore. In truth, I’ve coughed up funnier stuff.

In some sadder news, the also unfunny King of the Hill has been cancelled after many a season on the Murdoch channel. It may be moving to ABC, however. In a blow to comedy, FOX also cancelled MadTV, while Saturday Night Live continues to linger at NBC. FOX will be premiering Joss Whedon’s  new series Dollhouse, as well as swinging Jack Bauer back into action in a new season of 24. There are others on Fox’s lineup, but I shall not discuss them here, as I do not have my little pink puke bucket handy.

The CW, whose judgement I have doubted in the past, has whacked Valentine, Easy Money, and In Harm’s Way, and is about ready to let the axe fall on Everybody Hates Chris and The Game. They are keeping Gossip Girl and Privileged…  and they are also showing repeats of Jericho! Huzzah CW! Well, half of a huzzah anyway.

In my judgement some shows were cancelled unnecessarily while I think the studios could have done a big cleaning and axed quite a few more…

I apologize slightly for not continuing with the “war” metaphor I started on line two.
Or maybe I don’t.
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Links For Brains: 12/19/2008

December 19th, 2008 by Oskar Kennedy

Today, an extra long Links For Brains, since I’m feeling extra guilty about not posting recently. Hopefully, some interesting links followed by one-liners will tide you over until I can get brain back in gear.

  • U.S. military developing combat robots controlled by Nintendo Wii accessories. (Evil plot from 1/5 of early 90s movies is suddenly reality.)
  • Glomarization dissects Obama’s pandering to evangelicals Inauguration Day invitation to Rick Warren. (Read the whole thing; she saves the best question for last.)
  • Kirsten Sanford points out that sufficient skepticism could have saved people from the Bernie Madoff thing going all implodey. (Short summary; thanks to monkey brains, the GNP of a sizeable nation has now evaporated. Stupid monkey brains.)
  • After assuaging billion-dollar losses with bailout dough, big banks are handing out millions in executive bonuses. (Greed is not only good, it’s a prerequisite.)
  • Christopher Hitchens remains an unrepentant Scrooge. (Lest you think this an insult, remember that Scrooge didn’t just take Marley’s word for it, he needed evidence. Time travel evidence.)
  • Ben Goldacre recommends some fantastic gifts for folks whose season needs a little more reason. (Is it a secret author’s requirement that you recommend your own book as a Christmas present?)
  • A letter to Philadelphia Mayor Michael Nutter about his handling of budget problems, and his insistence on closing libraries, primarily in poor neighborhoods. (Let’ s hope that Mayor Nutter gets around to googling himself in the next 24 hours.)
  • Tiffany’s (the jeweller, not the former pop princess) continues its potential eBay-killing lawsuit on appeal, after federal judge rules that trademark holders have to protect their own intellectual property. (Next week, they’ll sue the guy who runs your local flea market because someone rented a booth to sell knockoffs.)
  • Muslim think tank in the UK finds that some Imams discriminate against women when enforcing Sharia law. (Offers to arrange a marriage for anyone who expresses surprise.)
  • Marcus Brigstocke nominates a climate scientist for his own winter holiday. (Necessary, since rapidly melting polar ice means that Santa will likely drown in just a few summers.)
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