Posts Tagged ‘hate’


How To Hate The Internet

April 15th, 2007 by Oskar Kennedy

A Young Lady’s Primer

1. Receive Friend Request from stranger on fucking MySpace.

2. View suspiciously professional looking headshot.

3. Suspect spambot.

4. Attempt to discern if requester is a real person; open requester’s profile.

5. Forget that speakers are powered on.

6. Claw frantically at head as horrible, grating pop song, obnoxious, eye-watering layout and promises of “more naughtier pics at my site” cause brainmeats to sublimate and stream from head holes.

7. Wait for seizures to abate.

8. Decline Friend Request.

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I generally hate quotations.

April 24th, 2007 by Oskar Kennedy

  If you look hard enough, and are willing to violently bludgeon any notion of context, you can find a quote from a respected authority to support most any proposition, from adult circumcision to zoophilia.

  Having said that, allow me to present a sentiment that I found particularly resonant in light of the recent furor over reproductive rights.

“[A] Constitution… is made for people of fundamentally differing views, and the accident of our finding certain opinions natural and familiar, or novel, and even shocking, ought not to conclude our judgment upon the question whether statutes embodying them conflict with the Constitution of the United States.”

  – Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. (1841-1935)
  Associate Justice of the United States Supreme Court, 1902-1932

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Why is This Surprising?

October 13th, 2008 by Oskar Kennedy

At a recent political rally, a Christian pastor asked his god to help John McCain win, so that all those people around the world praying to different gods for an Obama victory would be put in their places. For some reason, people find this shocking.

For those people, I have a simple question. What part of “monotheistic religion” do you not understand. This is the WHOLE POINT of Christianity. Everybody who doesn’t believe, who prays to their own god or gods, is inferior and hellbound. If you’re at all shocked that this is the attitude of a Christian preacher, than you need to wake the fuck up.

Allow me to demonstrate. Here is the horrible thing that the pastor said:

“I would also pray, Lord, that your reputation is involved in all that happens between now and November, because there are millions of people around this world praying to their god — whether it’s Hindu, Buddha, Allah — that his opponent wins, for a variety of reasons.”

And Lord, I pray that you would guard your own reputation, because they’re going to think that their god is bigger than you, if that happens.”
- Rev. Arnold Conrad, at a rally for Senator John McCain

Now, here is what his god says:

“I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery; Do not have any other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an idol, whether in the form of anything that is in heaven above, or that is on the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, punishing children for the iniquity of parents, to the third and the fourth generation of those who reject me.”
- God (as told to some guy pretending to be Moses, Exodus 20:2-1, New Revised Standard Version)

And just in case you think this kind of elitism is confined to the old testament:

“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
- Jesus (who, by some trick of math is also God, John 14:6, New International Version)

That’s the central tent of Christianity. Nobody can go to heaven unless they believe that Jesus was his own father, born to a teenage virgin, and that he eventually got up and went for a walk after being dead for three days. It’s inherently exclusive. Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Shintoists, everybody who doesn’t believe this story is going to be tortured for all eternity.

So tell me, exactly what is it that’s so shocking about the Rev. Conrad’s statement. That this is what his religion teaches, or that he made the mistake of telling the truth about his faith in public?

And by the way, this is the religion of both candidates. This faith, that teaches that damnation and torture are in store for everyone who doesn’t agree, that the world will end in fire and darkness, and that only those that believe will be saved. They both believe this. The Republicans are just a little more upfront about it.

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A Word (Or 250) About Prop 8

November 12th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

I have a solution.

To Proposition 8, that is.

Oh, you haven’t heard of Prop 8? It’s a state ballot measure in California seeking to amend the state constitution to restrict the definition of marriage as a union between a man and a woman. There has been a lot of flack directed towards the Mormon church because they pumped millions of dollars into support of the initiative. Also, voters in the state of California approved the measure.  However, it has only heated up the issue, and focused a national magnifying glass under a spotlight on the Prop, its detractors and contributors, and the state of California.

I have a solution so we can stop all of this bickering.

Abolish all marriage. Either it is a matter of the state or a matter of the church, but can’t be both. If it is a matter of the state, then equality must be attained and maintained. If it is a matter of the church, then the church decides what is right or wrong but has no bearing upon status or benefits allowed by the state. There cannot be a co-mingling. The church cannot dictate to the state.

So there you go. Two options. Either the state decides that all couples are equal or the state decides none have rights of partnership.

Before I hear from nutcases, like my sister or my aunt, that gay marriage will lead to all sorts of abominations, let me say that marriage can only be between consenting adults in the eyes of the state.

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Links For Brains: 12/12/2008

December 12th, 2008 by Oskar Kennedy
  • Notorious hate-based sect Westboro Baptist Church looks to put a sign blaming Santa for the bad economy into the mix outside the Washington state capitol building. (Fred Phelps is having those dreams about sweaty Elf sex again. Time to crank out some brimstone.)
  • Amanda Peet and Paul Offit team up to fight fear-mongering anti-vaccination propagandists. (The kids would call it “made of win,” if they hadn’t all died of measles and whooping cough.)
  • President Bush ties Endangered Species act to a tree, cuts out science oversight, leaves it to die. (Threatened species, including snail darter, spotted owl, intelligent Republicans, said to be terrified.)
  • Senate Arms Services Committee report concludes that “[a]buse of detainees in U.S. custody was a direct result of decisions by top administration officials.” (Document is six hundred pages of the word “duh,” with extensive footnotes.)
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