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Kill This Trend

September 12th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

I’ve compiled a list of trends and ideas that just need to go away. It will be good for television, good for individuals, and good for society in general. This list is just meant for trends in current media. I have a “no more” list for current trends in society as well, but there were so many for media I had to make a separate list.

No more Highlander sequels, television shows, comic books, radio shows, etc. There can be only one? Prove it.
No more reality shows. These people are as real as a stripper’s boobs or a politician’s smile. Documentary shows and cinema verité are fine art forms that catch real life in action. Reality shows, however, just exploit the greedy, the stupid, and the false. Normally I’d be okay with that exploitation, but when it gets in the way of “quality” programming (like Jericho, Firefly… but you’ve heard that rant before) I get a little angry.
No more news anchors telling me what I should think. I have a wife, a church, and a family to do that for me.
No more fearmongering! You read? Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, yada yada yada. If you don’t stop, I’m sure an asteroid will hit us, God® shall smite us, the LHC will poof us out of existence, and the Democrats will let another terrorist attack happen. You’d better be prepared.
No more American Idol. I have no words other than “Shit Sandwich.”
No more Toby Keith. A moratorium on all things Toby Keith should commence immediately, and last until further notice.
No more Paris Hilton. Ever. Well, maybe, but I have secret, wet and naked on top of me conditions.
No more legislation of morality. Puritania(!) has been dead for a long while. Let it stay dead.