Posts Tagged ‘society’


Get Your Geek On – 24 Hour LAN Party People

August 5th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

I’ve been a video game geek for most of my life. It started in the Seventies with Space Port, a local hangout in the Mall for kids with an excess of time, energy, and quarters. My parents bought a Magnavox Odyssey for family fun. It had FOUR games, and they were all variants on PONG, although they had much catchier names like Tennis, Hockey, Racquetball, and the one I can’t remember.

Because I was an overweight schmuck who thirsted for pixels and eschewed sweat, the Odyssey became the standard for sporting events. When I saw my first tennis match, I was amazed that the players could move toward the net – unbelievable!

After the Odyssey, my parents went with an Atari 2600 instead of the Intellivision system (like the one owned by my friend down the street), and they supplied me with game after game from Atari and Activision. This piqued my interest in game programming, which I tried once or twice on a Commodore 64. This lead to playing bigger and better games, as well as running my own BBS service. I went to college and soon forgot all of that. It wasn’t until I was introduced to Mechwarrior 2’s multi-player options that I got re-hooked into the gaming world.

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I’d Like to Ruin Television For You: Wednesday night

August 18th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

Wednesday night television has a few gems in a sea of malaise-inducing crud. I have to point out the few sparkling nuggets first. I adore Pushing Daisies, and not just because of Jim Dale’s animated voice-overs (he is the guy who performed all of the Harry Potter audio-books), but also because of the quirky nature of the characters, the plotting, as well as the wonderful use of costume, color, line, and. . . sorry, I think I slipped into my Get Your Geek On: Design persona. Anyway, it’s a crisp, colorful show and I’m glad ABC brought it back for another go-round. However, there is so much other silt to sift through that it makes the entire night a maze of sooty weeds.

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I’d Like to Ruin TV for You: Primetime Thursday

August 22nd, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

When I was a lad of just fourteen, an Irish priest came to visit my class to speak to us about the possibility of receiving Holy Orders and joining the priesthood. That’s not important or relevant. What is important AND relevant is that the Priest, with his Irish accent, didn’t pronounce the ‘th’ in third as a ‘th’ sound at all, but a hard ‘tuh’ sound, thus turning every “third” into “turd.” As a fourteen year old, I found this unendingly amusing. As a thirtysomething (turdysomething) with a fourteen year old mentality, I still find it amazingly funny, and appropriate when discussing this Fall’s Thursday’s (Turdsday) TV lineup.

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I’d Like to Ruin Television for You: Oh Those Midseason Blues

August 25th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

Talking about midseason shows and replacements on Network TV is a little like trying to channel a trendy Nostradamian figure while trying to stay away from the syrupy ickiness of an E! News (quite the contradiction) “host.” I will attempt to guide you through the muddle of Fall and into the “Shroud of Midseason.” While some networks have cemented schedules of certain shows that they KNOW will be coming back, there is also an unknown factor mixed with guesswork and a little transmutation, much like the wok of a crazed alchemist/psychic farting around with capacitors and transistors.

I am delaying. It’s true. I’m trying to find words that will soothe and make it all better. I want to apply a Band-Aid brand Band-Aid to the seeping wounds caused to our psyches by popular entertainment. I’m stumbling, I know, and I’m fishing for sharks in a pond with a piece of gum on frayed twine. I suppose I’ll start with the known quantities.

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My Racist Friend

September 4th, 2008 by Waldorf Van Buren

Recently I was shocked, appalled, and otherwise taken aback by comments from a friend. I’ve known this guy, whom I’ll call Richie, since Tenth grade, which is roughly twenty years. We were visiting the Ocean City (New Jersey) boardwalk and letting our collective kids (bunch of communist children) ride the rides in the swamp of germs and bullies. It wasn’t the actual visit or the rides or the communication during most of our visit that alarmed me, but a simple walk to the car to feed the meters for another fun hour.

While walking back with “Richie” and, uh, “Ken”, “Richie” started talking about politics. “Richie” is quite the typical redneck, softball playing, beer-swilling citizen of the town I grew up in, deep in the southern part of New Jersey (the other ass as I like to call it). He’s a proud Republican. Why? All the trite reasons – he thinks Democrats will raise his taxes, take away his guns, and let races other than white rule over his home. He used to be a gun owner until it was taken away by the police due to an illegal discharge. This was when he was a Police Officer, as well. He is also a Paramedic, who believes that “AIDS babies and Retards” should be killed, because they serve no purpose.

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